Building a meaningful and lasting relationship is one of the most complex goals that people sharing intimate moments are faced with. There is no clear cut formula in maintaining a relationship. Since the two parties in a relationship have unique personalities with diverse experiences, goals, vision and disposition, assessing whether a relationship will last long is a challenging task to do. However, there are simple techniques that will lead to a successful and meaningful relationship. These techniques have helped me in my own marriage. It wasn’t too long ago that I too was faced with the challenge of maintaining a meaningful and lasting relationship.
Important Ingredients in a Relationship
The importance of sex in an intimate relationship cannot be overemphasized. Although a relationship cannot last long with this factor alone, it is probably the fuel that drives a relationship to stay unscathed by various relationship killers. Many couples experience a decline in their sexual passion as they share more years together. In case you are experiencing the stage of declining zest in having sex with your partner, try to assess the root cause. In some cases, it is attributed to hormonal imbalance while others are adversely affected by a stressful workload or looking after the kids.
Recognizing the cause will play a great role in solving the problem. If you really value your current relationship, you have to take this really seriously. Do not assume that your partner will understand and will stay by your side until you are in good shape to make some changes. Relationships these days are very unstable and prone to lead to separation even for menial reasons; How much more so if the reason is a fundamental part of a relationship?
- Time to Talk
Each day is filled with overlapping scheduled activities or tasks to be completed. This is the lifestyle that most of us have. There may not even be ample time to share what transpired during the day to the person you consider most valuable. Is that not an irony? If a person is the most valuable to you, then utilize all ways in order to stay connected every single day. Thanks to modern gadgets that allow more efficient communication means, it doesn’t take more than 5 seconds to send a mobile text message saying: “Hi! I miss you” or “How is your day going?”. The barriers of distance and busy schedules are no longer an issue like they used to be.
Of course, nothing beats the physical delivery of messages and sharing your day’s achievements and frustrations. Thus, needless to say, you have to do all you can to make way for physical contact with one another and a time to talk.
- Feeling of oneness while maintaining your own identity
This is where many relationships fail. In one hand, some are too afraid that the relationship will not last anyways so they are too hesitant to merge their world with their partner. In most cases, this is brought about by previous undesirable experiences. On the other hand, some are drowned in the merging process that they cannot identify anymore with their own identity. We see here the two ends of the spectrum.
If you wish to build a meaningful and lasting relationship, you have to be ready to merge your personality with the other person without forgetting who you are. It is difficult to clearly illustrate the line where merging should stop. The test is whether you are able to feel like you and your partner are one spirit in two bodies but you could still go your way independently on matters that are affecting your identity. For example, if you are not into crafts and arts while your partner is crazy about it, you can start appreciating it without convincing yourself that you like it. This example however, is oversimplified. Dealing with a relationship is undeniably complex and it will take an effort on your part to discover your own identity as well as the identity you have with your partner.
Sex without care is futile. If sex is the only foundation of a relationship, then it will crash into pieces once the passion goes cold. Defining care is not as easy as what the dictionary defines it to be. Likewise, the appreciation of the care that you give to another person may be variable. People give various degrees of appreciation to a particular act depicting care. With that in mind, consider this: If you wish to maintain a meaningful and lasting relationship, then you do have to study and take note of what your partner appreciates most. You may find that while figuring this out you get frustrated for not getting the compliment that you are expecting but be patient. Once you discover what really matters to your partner, their gratefulness and appreciation will show. And remember, everyone shows appreciation differently so accept whatever recognition and thanks that you receive.
Summing up, building a meaningful and lasting relationship needs time and nurturing; much like a planted seed. A successful relationship is not written in the sky or in a book somewhere; it is something that the two parties involved should work for by teaming up to learn about each other and draw the path to success.
So, have you ever had challenges in your relationships? How have you rectified them? Or, what is your success to building and maintaining meaningful and lasting relationships?